Thursday, March 6, 2008

My Butterfly

Butterflies are everywhere I tell you. It is like that little angel of ours keeps saying, "Hey, Mom! I am still here... always... I am right here in your heart! Remember and think of me!"

At school today, I noticed one of my students had great big, flowery butterfly patches all over her jeans. When I got home, my butterfly flag had blown away from in front of the house and I had to go find it and secure it to it's post. Then, I was skimming the Pier One Catalog that arrived in the mail today and again- butterfly sconces. I know I am probably making these into coincidences, but I tell you I see them EVERYWHERE. I have probably been to my doctor's office 1000 times, but the last time I was there I noticed, yup, you guessed it - butterflies. They were on the wall paper in the bathroom of all places. It all started the weekend after I delivered Caroline, (well really it started in the hospital- read my first posts.) I was walking up my stairs, passing by my Willow Tree Angel collection. I did a double take because the "Angel of Freedom", which was the first angel I ever got from my dear friend, Cathy, holds a butterfly in her hands. It was gone! It had fallen off once before, but I had hot glued it on! I stopped and thought, hmmm now that is ironic.

Then, I searched HIGH and LOW for a butterfly stamp I have had for years. I wanted to make thank you cards for all those who had been so kind to us during our loss. Again, it was (and still is) missing! As I sit here typing, I look up to see a beautiful butterfly that was also given to me by Cathy. It says, "Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away." That was the quote I chose to be printed on our wedding programs and although I loved it then, I never knew how true it would become for us. Although my little Caroline didn't get to draw a single breath, she did live inside of me for 25 weeks and when we saw her, she certainly took our breath away. Next time you see a butterfly flying by (or on a kid's pair of jeans:) think of her and remember the quote at the top of my blog."A butterfly lights beside us like a sunbeam. And for a brief moment its glory and beauty belong to our world. But then it flies on again, and though we wish it could have stayed, we feel so lucky to have seen it."
Here is one butterfly that isn't going anywhere!

I love this poem and had to share it here.
Message of Hope
A whispered wish of remembrance
Silent words of loss
A song of good bye
An unspoken prayer for lasting peace
A message of hope
Rejoice for the spirit that has passed.
Release the sorrow and the sadness.
Rebuild a life again.
Emerging from your cocoon so gently placed
Sensing the freedom in the waiting sky
Wings open and quickly a flight
A drift in the air
dancing with the wind
Aglow in the sunlight.
The message of hope
Touching the spirit
Teaching to begin anew
Transforming the wish into hope
on the radiant wing of a butterfly.
~Kristy Dyer

1 comment:

Emily said...

How beautiful. I love it. The pictures are amazing, that tattoo rocks my socks off, and I've seen that picture of the baby with Jesus a thousand times and never paid attention to the butterfly! You go, God. :)